I have finally experienced halo-halo - or, more specifically, buko halo halo, which is halo halo served in a hollowed-out (HA! ha! halo is pronounced "HAH-loh" so it sounds like hollow so that's a pun!) coconut.
My immediate conclusion was that halo-halo was the invention of a Filipino stoner. Are you dubious? Tell me, who other than a pothead would sit around and think,
"You know what would be tasty? Ice cream. Yeah, some bright-purple ube (yam) ice cream. But not JUST ube ice cream - no, I'm thinking ice cream mixed with jello. ooh, and tapioca pearls. and caramelized bananas. and some sweetened jackfruit. and strips of coconut. and beans... kidney beans, or garbanzo beans, or maybe bean sprouts. and then I'll pour milk over the whole thing. No, wait, it needs more ice... let's add crushed ice. and hey, flan! yeah, chunks of flan de leche would be great! and maybe pinipig, aka rice krispies... or better yet, CORN FLAKES! yes, for a little bit of crunch, let's mix in some corn flakes! but wait...
something's still missing... what could it be?
CORN KERNELS! Yes, that's it, kernels of sweetcorn would be the perfect addition to my ice cream/jello/tapioca/banana/jackfruit/beans/coconut/milk/ice/flan/corn flake combination! God, I'm a genius."
Totally high.
I rest my case.
The result, however, is weirdly delicious. Emphasis on "weirdly," but even as I was thinking, "damn this is a bizarre taste experience," I couldn't stop eating. So... good job, stoners of the Philippines?
p.s. did you know that in the Philippines, until the death penalty was repealed a few years ago, possession of over 500g of pot was punishable by death? truth!
p.p.s. i don't smoke pot. just sayin'.
p.p.p.s. postscripts are awesome. especially on things that aren't letters and don't have signatures.
No comments:
Post a Comment