changed the layout - let me know if you have any problems viewing anything!
also, can somebody please talk me out of buying Against the Day as some "light reading" for the rest of my trip? I finished the three books I brought with me, and first of all, I really shouldn't be buying any others - I ought to be journaling, sleeping or at the least reading something philippines-related in the event that I have any downtime.
but... well. so i won't be able to keep from buying books altogether. but at the least I should get something NOT fifty billion pages long and impossibly difficult. a nice little terry pratchett. or the sequel to girl with a dragon tattoo. or even a little martin amis if I insist - house of meetings is on sale, pretty sure i remember it getting good reviews. and instead i'm opening up a freaking Pynchon. i mean, it took weeks - WEEKS - for me to get through gravity's rainbow and i spent much of that time completely bewildered. which was fun and all, but it ain't summer reading!
but i'm helpless. it's a thousand pages long! and has over a hundred characters! and i wants it!
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Saturday, June 12, 2010
cafe au lait should taste like coffee and computers should just work
also: this is random, but there's a really funny thing about coffeeshops here... i mean, they LOOK like American coffeeshops, starbucks and seattle's best and coffee bean... the only difference appears to be the presence of pandesal and lots of mango pastries. but today was the third time I've ordered cafe au lait and been asked, "what flavor?" and when I say, "uh, coffee flavored?" they say "umm... just a brewed coffee?" and i have to carefully explain that I would like a brewed coffee, sure, or espresso, whatever, but WITH milk and foam - you know, au lait - but WITHOUT any white chocolate or mocha or hazelnut flavoring - and no, NOT creamer, actual milk - yeah, hot milk - ok thanks! it's just - i mean - that's what cafe au lait is, you know? why have it on the menu if you don't actually serve it? and i mean obviously this isn't a big deal but it really amuses me.
also, on a less amusing note: Dell, Microsoft and the collective PC world are all evil, terrible, no-good persons and corporations. this netbook is being hackintoshed at the first possible moment.
also, on a less amusing note: Dell, Microsoft and the collective PC world are all evil, terrible, no-good persons and corporations. this netbook is being hackintoshed at the first possible moment.
and friday's child has three very different appointments
Yesterday was an interesting day... started out in Towerville, a relocation community way up north that - while relatively developed, thanks in part to the efforts of Gawad Kalinga and Couples for Christ - has a serious lack of job opportunities in the area. Many occupants still work their old jobs, an hour and a half away, and come to towerville on weekends to see their families.
Then traveled to Congress to interview (the sadly outgoing) Congresswoman Risa Hontiveros, who by rights should become the 12th partylist senator but no word yet on whether that's actually happening. I have never before in my life wanted to enter politics, but this woman is pretty much my new hero. So smart, strong, beautiful - and very, very quotable. you should have been there to see her, clutching her abdomen as she talked about the power of the womb, gesturing at her body as she said, "this is MY kingdom." a-freaking-mazing.
and then to Cubao, where i hung out in cafes getting inspired for my previous post by being frustrated with my wireless (see #2), eating alone (see #4), and getting lost (see #1). And then to a hip artist-run space tucked away amidst the malls - another nice thing about interviewing people, especially cool activist youths, they know all the sweet places to hang out - where I interviewed two activists and two of their friends over san migs (for them) and vodka and tonics (for me). I'm afraid my questions and their answers got a little less intelligible by the end... but it was a very interesting interview, especially on the topic of LGBT issues (all four were gay) and abortion (each of them knew people who had either had or sought abortions... and two of them, the non-activist two, were strongly opposed.) and then we hung out and talked into the morning. did you have any idea of the level of discrimination cruise ship employees face when they're at sea and there's no regulatory oversight??
so three different faces of activism in Manila... on the streets, with the groups that build houses as well as those that pass out condoms - in the House, with one of the major supporters of the RH bill - and among the middle-class youth, with activists working to change perceptions and opinions of their peers. lots to think about.
Then traveled to Congress to interview (the sadly outgoing) Congresswoman Risa Hontiveros, who by rights should become the 12th partylist senator but no word yet on whether that's actually happening. I have never before in my life wanted to enter politics, but this woman is pretty much my new hero. So smart, strong, beautiful - and very, very quotable. you should have been there to see her, clutching her abdomen as she talked about the power of the womb, gesturing at her body as she said, "this is MY kingdom." a-freaking-mazing.
and then to Cubao, where i hung out in cafes getting inspired for my previous post by being frustrated with my wireless (see #2), eating alone (see #4), and getting lost (see #1). And then to a hip artist-run space tucked away amidst the malls - another nice thing about interviewing people, especially cool activist youths, they know all the sweet places to hang out - where I interviewed two activists and two of their friends over san migs (for them) and vodka and tonics (for me). I'm afraid my questions and their answers got a little less intelligible by the end... but it was a very interesting interview, especially on the topic of LGBT issues (all four were gay) and abortion (each of them knew people who had either had or sought abortions... and two of them, the non-activist two, were strongly opposed.) and then we hung out and talked into the morning. did you have any idea of the level of discrimination cruise ship employees face when they're at sea and there's no regulatory oversight??
so three different faces of activism in Manila... on the streets, with the groups that build houses as well as those that pass out condoms - in the House, with one of the major supporters of the RH bill - and among the middle-class youth, with activists working to change perceptions and opinions of their peers. lots to think about.
Friday, June 11, 2010
why yes, I would indeed like some cheese with that
so i've talked about what's great about traveling... nice people, interesting food, new experiences, beautiful rice terraces (what's that? you say I HAVEN'T talked about the rice terraces? and haven't postedp pictures either? well golly gee. anyway - they're beautiful!)... so maybe you're saying to yourself, but Camila, why aren't you complaining about anything?
Okay. Probably nobody in the world was thinking that. but I'm going to complain anyway. Here's what sucks about my trip:
1. getting around. A) metro manila is very, very large. B) the transportation system is complex and confusing. there are at least 6 major forms of transportation and only 1 of them comes with maps. C) I am not centrally located. D) traffic is terrible. E) I am really, really, really bad with directions. you... you have no idea. and usually it doesn't bother me - i get a little lost, eventually I figure it out, whatever - but HERE, because of items A-D, I am already spending hours every day just getting from place to place. Add in E - specifically, the fact that I have, in a single day, spent multiple hours being LOST or suffering the consequences of getting lost and no i am not exaggerating, HOURS - and my abysmal sense of direction leads to a horrific amount of time wasted.
2. internet... I have three choices for internet and so far they are all pretty obnoxious. A) internet cafe... expensive, no privacy, i always feel awkward putting in my passwords on a public computer. B) a USB modem, which is very convenient but infuriatingly slow, or C) wifi in cafes etc - which would be great if it worked, but my 4#$!#@#@$@ netbook won't recognize any wifi signals anymore. it's a netbook! the whole point is to get on the net! and it's not just annoying because I want to browse the web or facebook or publish things here - I actually have emails I need to read for my research!
3. the heat. it's... it's hot. that's all.
4. being lonely. This is my first time really traveling by myself, and... well... I'm just glad that I'm interviewing people. It forces me to meet folks (four or more per day, so far!!) and talk to them, gives me company, and since we often meet for meals, reduces the number of times I have to eat alone. but I still spend a lot of time asking for tables for one, people-watching, or gazing out the windows of buses/jeepneys/taxis (see item 1). mornings are fine, since I'm dragging myself out of bed and getting ready, and my middays are usually busy, but evenings - evenings get more difficult.
5. sleep deprivation. I might possibly be very slightly overscheduling myself... by which I mean, I've taken over 25 interviews in the last week and a half, and toured three communities, and it's not left me much time for sleeping. but I'll try to do better... Hi, Dolores!
Okay. Probably nobody in the world was thinking that. but I'm going to complain anyway. Here's what sucks about my trip:
1. getting around. A) metro manila is very, very large. B) the transportation system is complex and confusing. there are at least 6 major forms of transportation and only 1 of them comes with maps. C) I am not centrally located. D) traffic is terrible. E) I am really, really, really bad with directions. you... you have no idea. and usually it doesn't bother me - i get a little lost, eventually I figure it out, whatever - but HERE, because of items A-D, I am already spending hours every day just getting from place to place. Add in E - specifically, the fact that I have, in a single day, spent multiple hours being LOST or suffering the consequences of getting lost and no i am not exaggerating, HOURS - and my abysmal sense of direction leads to a horrific amount of time wasted.
2. internet... I have three choices for internet and so far they are all pretty obnoxious. A) internet cafe... expensive, no privacy, i always feel awkward putting in my passwords on a public computer. B) a USB modem, which is very convenient but infuriatingly slow, or C) wifi in cafes etc - which would be great if it worked, but my 4#$!#@#@$@ netbook won't recognize any wifi signals anymore. it's a netbook! the whole point is to get on the net! and it's not just annoying because I want to browse the web or facebook or publish things here - I actually have emails I need to read for my research!
3. the heat. it's... it's hot. that's all.
4. being lonely. This is my first time really traveling by myself, and... well... I'm just glad that I'm interviewing people. It forces me to meet folks (four or more per day, so far!!) and talk to them, gives me company, and since we often meet for meals, reduces the number of times I have to eat alone. but I still spend a lot of time asking for tables for one, people-watching, or gazing out the windows of buses/jeepneys/taxis (see item 1). mornings are fine, since I'm dragging myself out of bed and getting ready, and my middays are usually busy, but evenings - evenings get more difficult.
5. sleep deprivation. I might possibly be very slightly overscheduling myself... by which I mean, I've taken over 25 interviews in the last week and a half, and toured three communities, and it's not left me much time for sleeping. but I'll try to do better... Hi, Dolores!
Thursday, June 10, 2010
topics, narratives, doubts
did i pick the wrong topic? can i possibly write about what i'm learning?
ok, ok, wrong question - I can certainly write about everything i'm learning. and i'm going to. that's already established. but is a completely open question whether I will manage to write anything good, and that's where I have been worried.
it's not that my interviews haven't been interesting - quite, quite the contrary! i will confess that I am not sure if OTHER people would (or will) find them as interesting as I am, but I think the women (and man) I've been talking to are absolutely fascinating people. and they have really interesting and sometimes unexpected answers to the main question of my research - why did you become an activist, and why a woman's activist in particular. there's definitely a lot to work with.
maybe too much, but it's not that my subject is too broad. i mean, it is broad - I am talking to activists from a lot of different sectors and ideologies - but there are really basic consistencies in their experiences and stories that would make it not terribly difficult to focus within the subject. and i could focus on just one person or group as a sort of anchor for my story.
and it's not that my choice of subject is completely arbitrary or anything. youth activism, women's rights, the global south... those are all not-random topics, right? and young activists in the philippines are in a fairly unique situation, with the strong history of militant activism that was inspired by martial rule that my generation never experienced. so the question of what motivates youth activists for woman's rights in this country is not something i totally pulled out of a hat, you know.
and yet ever since I started my interviews i haver been troubled by this nagging fear that I did, indeed, choose the wrong topic. and I shake it off and tell myself that as long as this stuff is still interesting to me, as long as I enjoy thinking about it and writing about it and reading about it, it will probably all work out. but i'm not quite convincing myself.
here are the problems:
1. neutrality. there is no way for me to be impartial on this subject. i agree way too strongly with what these activists are working for to be able to really step back from the situation and give it a proper critical analysis. i mean, i think it would be hard for any decent person to say "hmm i'm going to neutrally analyze human trafficking and maternal mortality and look at the pros and cons" but maybe somebody else could, and maybe they would do a better job on this project.
but then I think, would I really want to spend months working on a project I don't personally care about? like... let's see... well, in the same sort of genre, i could write about development banks and the politics behind where money gets distributed. i mean, i couldn't actually write about that, because I don't know anything about it and I think it sounds pretty boring, BUT if I were to write about it, I think I could consider both the benefits the money can be used for and the problems in distribution - balanced-like, you know? but I can't consider the cons of dedicating your life to helping battered woman escape their abusive relationships or providing emergency medical care to teenage girls suffering complications from back-alley abortions. I feel like I should, like at some point I have to, but I can't.
2. context. there is SO MUCH. starting with colonialism, you know? and now this sounds like one of my lolo's stories - "well, first I was born..." but then the marcos' and martial law and the first quarter storm and EDSA - and then after that the rejectionists and the reaffirmists, the soc-dems and dem-socs and nat-dems, the Catholic Church, the activist tradition at UP, the struggles of women and feminists within the nationalist/communist movement, the NPA today, the root causes of violence in Mindanao, the pressures causing women to work in call centers or as OFW or to seek foreign marriages... i mean, there's just no way. I can't fit all of that in anything remotely a decent length without oversimplifying to a criminal extent. so while my topic itself isn't necessarily too big, everything necessary to understand it... well, that's another story.
3. general interest. this is actually the big one. and while I said above that my topic isn't pulled out of a hat, I think it might seem like it is. i am trying to imagine writing about this for a mainstream audience, imagining a readership that while not antagonistic ('cuz that's no fun to think about) is, at the very least, very busy and distracted. because aren't we all. and the question I am stuck with is, why should they care? I know why I care, but personal curiosity certainly can't be generalized. i could write on this subject for an activism-oriented publication, or for a global-south oriented organization - and maybe for a woman's rights organization, but probably not, but maybe that's just cynicism talking - and certainly for an academic publication where i'd pretty much assume the reader will be bored and only reading because they have to - but my point is that I haven't figured out how to frame the stories of these activists in a way that is of any evident interest to people who would not be interested to begin with. except for pulling cheap tricks like starting with a dramatic hospital or street scene and then pulling a fake-out to focus on the activists instead of what they're fighting. which i guess i might do but i would hope i could do better.
4. narrative. i'd like to have some sort of arc that I can use to make my project seem less like an assortment of individuals and more like a part of some sort of pattern or story. and i can pull a story out of these interviews... i can pull out lots of stories, in fact, and take my pick. but none of them are very honest.
for instance: after the fall of marcos, filipinos thought the need for activism was over, and now that the younger generation is seeing the problems still plaguing society and returning to activism - but through new, tech-savvy methods. or: after the fall of marcos, activism - in the traditional, rallies-and-demonstrations sense - remained strong, but it is only now that modern technologies are distracting the youth and they are turning to weaker "armchair activism" and the social movements are flagging.
or: after the fall of marcos, the tradition of women's rights activism strongly linked to the communist movement began to go out of favor, and the new women's rights activists are more politically diverse - and young activists represent a wide range of views. or they don't. or forget history, i could just tell the story of how the new generation of activists is motivated by what they witness in others, not by their own experiences. or i could say the opposite.
and they are all supported by the interviews i have. what do I do? how do i pick? it feels very wrong to just choose my favorite - i should be trying to write something true, right? but how do I stay honest to what i'm seeing and hearing when it's all too damn complicated?
that was long. you don't care about this. but it's what i've been spending a lot of time thinking about (although this hastily-written post probably doesn't seem like it - what can i say, i got four hours of sleep and walked about fifteen miles today, don't hate)
i am beginning to formulate a plan - i've been working on it for a while now. i keep having interviews, focusing on my main topic, but also diving more deeply into a few of the issues women's rights activists are working on - specifically rep. health (and the bill thereof), sex ed (and the controversy over an education official's decision to incldue it in the schools), and VAW (and the law that was passed a while ago). and in those discussion talk not only about what youth activists are doing/thinking, but what trends they observe in their peers. and then also talk to some non-activists (which i have already done a little bit).
i still feel like it will take some squeezing to make a coherant story out of it - but i'll wait and see. so far there are some definite patterns in what i've been hearing on the subjects.
what would those stories look like? youth activists try to motivate their peers - who support the RH bill but are not very vocal about it - into pressuring politicians to support it. (problems with this story... i'm not quite sure yet if youth activists actually are working to mobilize their peers. they don't bring it up unless i ask about it - obviously problematic). or: young people, with new sexual practices (in call centers) as well as old ones (young pregnancies) have a high demand for sex ed, which is being denied them by the cath. church and gov't. as the gov't pressures the education ministry to go back on its plans to teach sex ed in elementary schools, young volunteers both petition for sex ed in schools and provide it on the streets themselves thru various youth RH groups. (this one has some serious class issues - access to contraceptives and info is readily available for the middle class, not for the lower classes. but middle class kids are the ones who are more comfortable talking about sex - and therefore, i am thinking (need to hear more about it) more likely to actually petition for sex ed). or: while the phils have a long tradition of silence about abuse within families (b/c of the shame it brings on a family to discuss it) young women who have experienced abuse themselves are fighting to educate their peers to help end the culture of silence. (sounds good, huh? pity it's way more complicated than that).
anyway. those are my working ideas. my strategy right now is in my interviews, after asking about motivations (and talking for like an hour), i throw out - "so, how bout that RH bill?" i try to keep the questions open-ended at first (to avoid just completely making up a story) but after a while push a little more on the intergenerational question. repeat this for a few more weeks and then look over it all and see if a less-troubled, more-true story pops out at me.
not sure if that's what i should be doing, though. this is all rather new to me. and rather overwhelming.
good thing it's also really interesting!
AHHHH I NEED TO SLEEP
ok, ok, wrong question - I can certainly write about everything i'm learning. and i'm going to. that's already established. but is a completely open question whether I will manage to write anything good, and that's where I have been worried.
it's not that my interviews haven't been interesting - quite, quite the contrary! i will confess that I am not sure if OTHER people would (or will) find them as interesting as I am, but I think the women (and man) I've been talking to are absolutely fascinating people. and they have really interesting and sometimes unexpected answers to the main question of my research - why did you become an activist, and why a woman's activist in particular. there's definitely a lot to work with.
maybe too much, but it's not that my subject is too broad. i mean, it is broad - I am talking to activists from a lot of different sectors and ideologies - but there are really basic consistencies in their experiences and stories that would make it not terribly difficult to focus within the subject. and i could focus on just one person or group as a sort of anchor for my story.
and it's not that my choice of subject is completely arbitrary or anything. youth activism, women's rights, the global south... those are all not-random topics, right? and young activists in the philippines are in a fairly unique situation, with the strong history of militant activism that was inspired by martial rule that my generation never experienced. so the question of what motivates youth activists for woman's rights in this country is not something i totally pulled out of a hat, you know.
and yet ever since I started my interviews i haver been troubled by this nagging fear that I did, indeed, choose the wrong topic. and I shake it off and tell myself that as long as this stuff is still interesting to me, as long as I enjoy thinking about it and writing about it and reading about it, it will probably all work out. but i'm not quite convincing myself.
here are the problems:
1. neutrality. there is no way for me to be impartial on this subject. i agree way too strongly with what these activists are working for to be able to really step back from the situation and give it a proper critical analysis. i mean, i think it would be hard for any decent person to say "hmm i'm going to neutrally analyze human trafficking and maternal mortality and look at the pros and cons" but maybe somebody else could, and maybe they would do a better job on this project.
but then I think, would I really want to spend months working on a project I don't personally care about? like... let's see... well, in the same sort of genre, i could write about development banks and the politics behind where money gets distributed. i mean, i couldn't actually write about that, because I don't know anything about it and I think it sounds pretty boring, BUT if I were to write about it, I think I could consider both the benefits the money can be used for and the problems in distribution - balanced-like, you know? but I can't consider the cons of dedicating your life to helping battered woman escape their abusive relationships or providing emergency medical care to teenage girls suffering complications from back-alley abortions. I feel like I should, like at some point I have to, but I can't.
2. context. there is SO MUCH. starting with colonialism, you know? and now this sounds like one of my lolo's stories - "well, first I was born..." but then the marcos' and martial law and the first quarter storm and EDSA - and then after that the rejectionists and the reaffirmists, the soc-dems and dem-socs and nat-dems, the Catholic Church, the activist tradition at UP, the struggles of women and feminists within the nationalist/communist movement, the NPA today, the root causes of violence in Mindanao, the pressures causing women to work in call centers or as OFW or to seek foreign marriages... i mean, there's just no way. I can't fit all of that in anything remotely a decent length without oversimplifying to a criminal extent. so while my topic itself isn't necessarily too big, everything necessary to understand it... well, that's another story.
3. general interest. this is actually the big one. and while I said above that my topic isn't pulled out of a hat, I think it might seem like it is. i am trying to imagine writing about this for a mainstream audience, imagining a readership that while not antagonistic ('cuz that's no fun to think about) is, at the very least, very busy and distracted. because aren't we all. and the question I am stuck with is, why should they care? I know why I care, but personal curiosity certainly can't be generalized. i could write on this subject for an activism-oriented publication, or for a global-south oriented organization - and maybe for a woman's rights organization, but probably not, but maybe that's just cynicism talking - and certainly for an academic publication where i'd pretty much assume the reader will be bored and only reading because they have to - but my point is that I haven't figured out how to frame the stories of these activists in a way that is of any evident interest to people who would not be interested to begin with. except for pulling cheap tricks like starting with a dramatic hospital or street scene and then pulling a fake-out to focus on the activists instead of what they're fighting. which i guess i might do but i would hope i could do better.
4. narrative. i'd like to have some sort of arc that I can use to make my project seem less like an assortment of individuals and more like a part of some sort of pattern or story. and i can pull a story out of these interviews... i can pull out lots of stories, in fact, and take my pick. but none of them are very honest.
for instance: after the fall of marcos, filipinos thought the need for activism was over, and now that the younger generation is seeing the problems still plaguing society and returning to activism - but through new, tech-savvy methods. or: after the fall of marcos, activism - in the traditional, rallies-and-demonstrations sense - remained strong, but it is only now that modern technologies are distracting the youth and they are turning to weaker "armchair activism" and the social movements are flagging.
or: after the fall of marcos, the tradition of women's rights activism strongly linked to the communist movement began to go out of favor, and the new women's rights activists are more politically diverse - and young activists represent a wide range of views. or they don't. or forget history, i could just tell the story of how the new generation of activists is motivated by what they witness in others, not by their own experiences. or i could say the opposite.
and they are all supported by the interviews i have. what do I do? how do i pick? it feels very wrong to just choose my favorite - i should be trying to write something true, right? but how do I stay honest to what i'm seeing and hearing when it's all too damn complicated?
that was long. you don't care about this. but it's what i've been spending a lot of time thinking about (although this hastily-written post probably doesn't seem like it - what can i say, i got four hours of sleep and walked about fifteen miles today, don't hate)
i am beginning to formulate a plan - i've been working on it for a while now. i keep having interviews, focusing on my main topic, but also diving more deeply into a few of the issues women's rights activists are working on - specifically rep. health (and the bill thereof), sex ed (and the controversy over an education official's decision to incldue it in the schools), and VAW (and the law that was passed a while ago). and in those discussion talk not only about what youth activists are doing/thinking, but what trends they observe in their peers. and then also talk to some non-activists (which i have already done a little bit).
i still feel like it will take some squeezing to make a coherant story out of it - but i'll wait and see. so far there are some definite patterns in what i've been hearing on the subjects.
what would those stories look like? youth activists try to motivate their peers - who support the RH bill but are not very vocal about it - into pressuring politicians to support it. (problems with this story... i'm not quite sure yet if youth activists actually are working to mobilize their peers. they don't bring it up unless i ask about it - obviously problematic). or: young people, with new sexual practices (in call centers) as well as old ones (young pregnancies) have a high demand for sex ed, which is being denied them by the cath. church and gov't. as the gov't pressures the education ministry to go back on its plans to teach sex ed in elementary schools, young volunteers both petition for sex ed in schools and provide it on the streets themselves thru various youth RH groups. (this one has some serious class issues - access to contraceptives and info is readily available for the middle class, not for the lower classes. but middle class kids are the ones who are more comfortable talking about sex - and therefore, i am thinking (need to hear more about it) more likely to actually petition for sex ed). or: while the phils have a long tradition of silence about abuse within families (b/c of the shame it brings on a family to discuss it) young women who have experienced abuse themselves are fighting to educate their peers to help end the culture of silence. (sounds good, huh? pity it's way more complicated than that).
anyway. those are my working ideas. my strategy right now is in my interviews, after asking about motivations (and talking for like an hour), i throw out - "so, how bout that RH bill?" i try to keep the questions open-ended at first (to avoid just completely making up a story) but after a while push a little more on the intergenerational question. repeat this for a few more weeks and then look over it all and see if a less-troubled, more-true story pops out at me.
not sure if that's what i should be doing, though. this is all rather new to me. and rather overwhelming.
good thing it's also really interesting!
AHHHH I NEED TO SLEEP
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
condoms
ay, so tired. i've been leaving the condo around 7 and getting back at 10 these last few days... but today I got to sleep in and not leave 'til 9, but alas I didn't return until 12:30!
i should change my blogger clock to reflect real time...
ANYWAY today among other things I went to another urban poor community, this one way up north, and hung out in the home of Ate G - wonderful lady, works for an NGO i'm partnering with.. I wanted to ask where she (and her children and her niece) slept in that tiny room, but I thought it would be rude.. based on the pillows and blankets on a shelf, I could only assume on the floor... the concrete floor. but perhaps there was a clever system set up and a more comfortable situation was hiding along a wall or something. i wish i'd been brave enough to ask.
I was, however, brave enough to bring up the question of sex ed and contraceptive use with the kids i was hanging out with (the board of the youth club in the community - I call them kids but some were my age) and after a brief awkward silence we had a great discussion. i asked about sex ed at their schools and whether talking about sex was still as taboo as it used to be, they asked if the US had an HIV problem and whether contraceptives were openly bought and used. highlight: they were astonished to discover that at school i have access to free condoms (I didn't even mention that entire CITIES have access to free condoms). and they bemoaned the high cost of condoms in their community (24 pesos a pack... that's less than fifty cents. but fifty cents buys a lot more here and is a lot harder to come by in these communities. but let's not talk about how much i had in my pocket at the time. arrrrrrgh the money i don't know what to do about it).
anyway, they asked when I would come back to the Philippines (cue stuttering) and I said whenever it was, i would bring free American condoms as souvenirs from the states. a boxful, I said, and H pointed at my shoulder bag and said, "no, bags full," and a boy laughed, and said, "a truck!" and I said, "ok, ok, a plane!" and then a kid in the corner said, "ah, but you'll need extra small sizes, for the filipinos..." and a kid in the other corner piped up in tagalog - not for me! and we all laughed. and I wondered about 24 pesos, and 13-year-old mothers, and the catholic church, and the HIV epidemic at call centers, and the fact that ate G won't sell condoms from her corner shop to anybody under 18 - but the kids here go to college at 15, if they go to college, and there are people getting married at 14. and then H was asking if she could come to my wedding, and we decided she could be my flowergirl, and then later we talked about throwing condoms around the streets of valenzuela city like a flowergirl throwing flowers and we all laughed.
what's the point of this story again? oh yes. condoms. and how you, my american friends, should not take your free condoms (or your ability to afford to buy them) for granted.
i should change my blogger clock to reflect real time...
ANYWAY today among other things I went to another urban poor community, this one way up north, and hung out in the home of Ate G - wonderful lady, works for an NGO i'm partnering with.. I wanted to ask where she (and her children and her niece) slept in that tiny room, but I thought it would be rude.. based on the pillows and blankets on a shelf, I could only assume on the floor... the concrete floor. but perhaps there was a clever system set up and a more comfortable situation was hiding along a wall or something. i wish i'd been brave enough to ask.
I was, however, brave enough to bring up the question of sex ed and contraceptive use with the kids i was hanging out with (the board of the youth club in the community - I call them kids but some were my age) and after a brief awkward silence we had a great discussion. i asked about sex ed at their schools and whether talking about sex was still as taboo as it used to be, they asked if the US had an HIV problem and whether contraceptives were openly bought and used. highlight: they were astonished to discover that at school i have access to free condoms (I didn't even mention that entire CITIES have access to free condoms). and they bemoaned the high cost of condoms in their community (24 pesos a pack... that's less than fifty cents. but fifty cents buys a lot more here and is a lot harder to come by in these communities. but let's not talk about how much i had in my pocket at the time. arrrrrrgh the money i don't know what to do about it).
anyway, they asked when I would come back to the Philippines (cue stuttering) and I said whenever it was, i would bring free American condoms as souvenirs from the states. a boxful, I said, and H pointed at my shoulder bag and said, "no, bags full," and a boy laughed, and said, "a truck!" and I said, "ok, ok, a plane!" and then a kid in the corner said, "ah, but you'll need extra small sizes, for the filipinos..." and a kid in the other corner piped up in tagalog - not for me! and we all laughed. and I wondered about 24 pesos, and 13-year-old mothers, and the catholic church, and the HIV epidemic at call centers, and the fact that ate G won't sell condoms from her corner shop to anybody under 18 - but the kids here go to college at 15, if they go to college, and there are people getting married at 14. and then H was asking if she could come to my wedding, and we decided she could be my flowergirl, and then later we talked about throwing condoms around the streets of valenzuela city like a flowergirl throwing flowers and we all laughed.
what's the point of this story again? oh yes. condoms. and how you, my american friends, should not take your free condoms (or your ability to afford to buy them) for granted.
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
trashtown
this afternoon i climbed to the top of a mountain of garbage, overlooking an urban slum in Malabon, where children played on top of the trash.
this evening i ate dinner at a shiny, glitzy mall, in the fanciest pizza hut I've ever seen in my life, with a bill that - while rather modest - could have fed dinner to dozens of kids in Malabon. I have been thinking about money a lot lately, in case you can't tell.
visiting a slum - or a squatter community - or, to use the proper term, an informal settlement - was a pretty unexpected experience. Unexpected because... well, I should probably wait a little longer to process everything i saw and smelled today, but whatever, I'll just write off the cuff here. It was way more enjoyable than I'd expected.
that might sound terrible, I don't know, but when I think of communities of the urban poor in the global south, I think of the pictures on the pamphlets that ask you for money - malnourished children and dreadfully diseased families. and i think of crime and violence and general misery.
and the community we visited today - well, let me start by saying that I don't mean to say it was rosy. it certainly didn't smell like roses. it was literally built on top of trash - an old pond filled with garbage until it was solid enough to construct ramshackle houses on - and it smelled like it. and looked like it. and as an informal settlement it has huge, huge problems. regular flooding. regular fires. contaminated water supply. flimsy, tiny houses. hygiene issues. unmanaged human waste. high incidence of preventable childhood diseases like diarrhea and dengue. unemployment, of course, and poverty, and hunger, and uneducated children.
and see, doesn't that sound terrible? i mean, it is. it is terrible. but if you read that catalog of challenges, you might picture a perfectly miserable community full of the ill, dying, dreary, depressed, starving and generally agonized. i mean, that's what i pictured.
and instead, i found... people. what an inane observation, but there ya go. People - playing games, sleeping, doing each others' hair, cooking food, washing their children or their laundry, working, building houses, repairing houses, watching TV, watching youtube videos, laughing at the crazy foreigner. children playing hopscotch (i forget the tagalog word) and, as soon as they saw me and my camera, chasing me down to mug for a picture and practice their english. "What's your name?" "what's your name?" "What's your name?" "Hello!" "Thank you!" "What your house?" "What your age?" "What your favorite animal?" K said, "it's because you're so white," and then he laughed, and said, "so, SO white!" and B, as American as me but far more Filipino, asked what it was like to be so obviously a foreigner. I shrugged, and said for the fiftieth time, "Camila. What's yours?" And the children laughed, and their parents smiled, and I smiled back, and another kid asked, "What's your name?"
I guess the stupid, obvious lesson i learned today is that desperately poor communities are, in fact, still communities. And not necessarily miserable ones, for all their problems. Thursday K is taking me and B to another community that once was much like the Malabon settlement and now enjoys greater stability and healthier living conditions - so i bet my next obvious lesson will be that the problems can get better. Get excited for more incisive observations like "people are people."
Anyway, I really am not trying to discredit or diminish the suffering caused by inadequate and unhealthy living conditions. But i am trying to express - well, let me put it this way. I thought I was going to have an expression of pained sympathy engraved on my face after spending two hours touring a slum community built on a dump and full of impoverished families. And instead my face hurt from smiling so much. and that surprised me.
this evening i ate dinner at a shiny, glitzy mall, in the fanciest pizza hut I've ever seen in my life, with a bill that - while rather modest - could have fed dinner to dozens of kids in Malabon. I have been thinking about money a lot lately, in case you can't tell.
visiting a slum - or a squatter community - or, to use the proper term, an informal settlement - was a pretty unexpected experience. Unexpected because... well, I should probably wait a little longer to process everything i saw and smelled today, but whatever, I'll just write off the cuff here. It was way more enjoyable than I'd expected.
that might sound terrible, I don't know, but when I think of communities of the urban poor in the global south, I think of the pictures on the pamphlets that ask you for money - malnourished children and dreadfully diseased families. and i think of crime and violence and general misery.
and the community we visited today - well, let me start by saying that I don't mean to say it was rosy. it certainly didn't smell like roses. it was literally built on top of trash - an old pond filled with garbage until it was solid enough to construct ramshackle houses on - and it smelled like it. and looked like it. and as an informal settlement it has huge, huge problems. regular flooding. regular fires. contaminated water supply. flimsy, tiny houses. hygiene issues. unmanaged human waste. high incidence of preventable childhood diseases like diarrhea and dengue. unemployment, of course, and poverty, and hunger, and uneducated children.
and see, doesn't that sound terrible? i mean, it is. it is terrible. but if you read that catalog of challenges, you might picture a perfectly miserable community full of the ill, dying, dreary, depressed, starving and generally agonized. i mean, that's what i pictured.
and instead, i found... people. what an inane observation, but there ya go. People - playing games, sleeping, doing each others' hair, cooking food, washing their children or their laundry, working, building houses, repairing houses, watching TV, watching youtube videos, laughing at the crazy foreigner. children playing hopscotch (i forget the tagalog word) and, as soon as they saw me and my camera, chasing me down to mug for a picture and practice their english. "What's your name?" "what's your name?" "What's your name?" "Hello!" "Thank you!" "What your house?" "What your age?" "What your favorite animal?" K said, "it's because you're so white," and then he laughed, and said, "so, SO white!" and B, as American as me but far more Filipino, asked what it was like to be so obviously a foreigner. I shrugged, and said for the fiftieth time, "Camila. What's yours?" And the children laughed, and their parents smiled, and I smiled back, and another kid asked, "What's your name?"
I guess the stupid, obvious lesson i learned today is that desperately poor communities are, in fact, still communities. And not necessarily miserable ones, for all their problems. Thursday K is taking me and B to another community that once was much like the Malabon settlement and now enjoys greater stability and healthier living conditions - so i bet my next obvious lesson will be that the problems can get better. Get excited for more incisive observations like "people are people."
Anyway, I really am not trying to discredit or diminish the suffering caused by inadequate and unhealthy living conditions. But i am trying to express - well, let me put it this way. I thought I was going to have an expression of pained sympathy engraved on my face after spending two hours touring a slum community built on a dump and full of impoverished families. And instead my face hurt from smiling so much. and that surprised me.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)